on mother's day

"life is [just] too important to be taken seriously." 

- oscar wilde

this past week:

• i washed my hands with saline solution instead of soap (don't worry, i realized after i washed my hands. so i washed my hands again with soap)
• i took an expired pregnancy vitamin instead of ibuprofen for my migraine (what? the bottles look the same in the dark without glasses on)
• i cleaned my bedroom - which is to say that i took the clutter out from said room and transferred it to the hallway
• there's a corner in my home that perpetually smells like pee and i haven't managed to figure out where it's coming from (i won't tell you for how long)
• i've been told that we (the wife and i) always look a little stressed (it's not my imagination. i have been rocking the tired and flustered look all this time!)

i reflect a lot about mothering on this space. 

i feel very strongly about the ways i want to parent, the kind of mother i want to be. i wax poetic about the things i learn from my children and the person i am becoming because i am a mother.

when the going gets rough and severely sleep-deprived and messy and stinky and inconvenient and crazy, i turn to this space so i can refocus my consciousness on all the things i love about life and mothering. 

this mother's day, i'd like to take a moment to celebrate all the meltdowns, the misbehaving, the muck, the grouchiness, the failed attempts at keeping a clean house, not to mention all the comically disastrous occasions that are born from good intentions. for these are the things that keep me humble. because when i manage to come through the hill of annoyance and overcome all else (including the perpetual mountain of dirty dishes) to simply be the mother my kids need me to be - and find that i'm still the person i'm striving to become, i get to thump my chest and roar to the wind: i did it. i made it through another day. my kids are alive and healthy. they are happy. they know they are loved. my wife is at my side. i still get to knit.

happy mother's day to my wonderful wife. thank you for taking turns doing all the yucky stuff with me. and for taking on the job of doing all the things i actually really don't like doing. i promise forever more to deal with all the bugs and the arts and craft sessions.

happy mother's day to all who join me in playing the role of mom.
 

may we all recognize and cherish the spirit of our role in the universe with humility, love, and laughter - especially when there's vomit all over your hair and your child is melting down because you gave them your angry mom eyes (you know you have one. and if you're a new mom and you don't have one yet, don't worry. you'll develop one. and it will be legendary).